5 Biblical Hacks to Deal with Difficult People
Let's be real. Dealing with difficult people isn't everyone's forte, including mine. When faced with curt remarks or snappiness, my initial response tends to lean towards defensiveness. Depending on the intensity of their attitude, I often find myself leaving the encounter aggravated or downright mad. Life, however, doesn't always offer an escape route from such situations, especially during seasons like the holidays.
Lately, I've encountered some challenging individuals—people who, despite their rough edges, hold great value in my life. Wrestling with the dilemma of how to handle these relationships, I turned to the Bible for guidance. In the midst of my search, a specific scripture spoke volumes:
"But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you..." (Luke 6:26-31 NLT, emphasis mine).
These words illuminated a path for me—love, do good, bless, pray, give—an answer to my question. The truth is, hurting people hurt others. Difficult individuals often carry unseen wounds, and God provides us with a guideline to navigate these challenging relationships. Here are five steps that God revealed to me for dealing with difficult people.
First, Love Unconditionally:
"‘Love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matthew 22:36-40 NIV)
To love our neighbor, in essence, means to agapao love—to love by choice and with an act of the will, unconditionally. God calls us to love difficult people just as He loves us.
Second, Do Good with Wisdom:
"Do to others as you would have them do to you." (Luke 6:31 NIV)
Doing good involves more than just benevolent actions; it means acting rightly and speaking well of others, ensuring our words reflect God's grace.
Third, Speak Well:
"Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you." (Luke 6:27-28 NIV)
Blessing our enemies goes beyond asking God to bless them; it involves speaking well of them—finding positive words even in challenging situations.
Fourth, Pray with a Transformed Heart:
"Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." (Matthew 5:44 NIV)
Prayer, strategically placed after love and goodness, allows our hearts to transform before seeking divine intervention. Praying from a changed heart makes a more significant impact.
Fifth, Give Thoughtfully:
"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34 NIV)
Giving to difficult individuals requires being in tune with God. It might involve forgiveness, grace, kindness, understanding, or even a tangible gift—offering what they truly need.
Following these steps, Jesus promises a reward from heaven, emphasizing kindness even to the unthankful and wicked. We're urged to be compassionate, just as our Father is compassionate.
Are you grappling with difficult people in your life? Is God prompting actions that could bring healing to both the person and the relationship? Friend, God's instructions may not always be easy, but they are fruitful. As we step out in obedience, our relationships will reach new depths.
Let's Pray Together:
Heavenly Father, we thank you for providing direction in our relationships. Grant us the grace to apply these principles in our lives. Help us see difficult people through Your eyes. Lord, acknowledge that at times, we may be the difficult ones. Guide us to reflect more of Your character. In Jesus' name, Amen!
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